Where Have I Been?
Written October 2021
It has been months since my last blog post. I decided to stop using the WIX site for my blog because it costs money and since I hadn’t really been writing, it felt like a waste of money. Well, fast forward a couple months and it actually feels like I’ve been walking in a fog for the months I haven’t been writing. Keeping busy and keeping a clear, busy mind in the present moment are two totally different things! I know because I have the keeping busy part well rehearsed.
I have taken an interim position in the public school system at a school in which I am familiar. It is full time and is definitely keeping me busy, both physically and mentally.
Clear, Busy Mind-Present Moment:
This is the much more difficult part of the last couple months. I have found myself looping thoughts of Todd, in various moments in time, both good times and challenging times, all throughout the day. While this is all part of living in my life as it currently is, it has become a heavier weight than it had been. This is not to say I’m more sad, miss him more, or hurt more. It is to say that I see the looping thoughts and feelings as something that needs to be released and I can do that through writing. So... I started writing the blog again.
Does that answer the question of, “Where have I been?” Not really sure, but it does help me know that, on my journey, I am on a positive path.
Written December 2021
The girls and I took a trip to Asheville, NC to continue our new tradition of going somewhere together right before Christmas. We stayed in a beautiful VRBO on the edge of town, close enough to walk to some great places and see the majestic view of the mountains. While the shopping, gem mining, views, and food were great, the best part about the trip for me was the car ride.
We all learned so much about music through Todd. So many memories are grounded in a song he played over and over, played for us the first time, or a song that was so obscure we would now need a full conversation to even figure out where to find it again. That is why the car ride to and from Asheville was the best part for me. We laughed, cried, sang our hearts out, and shared fond memories of the music that connects us to Todd.
The following are pictures since the last blog post back in June. These are some of the highlights of exactly where I have been. :)
Week on a Boat, Lake Cumberland
World Chicken Festival, Mount Vernon, KY
So, I continue on my journey as I learn to grow, even through grief! Hoping to find more time to write and stay connected!